There's a lot of alliterating in today's paper, most notably, Jim Foti's A section warning that Obama's visit will complete a "triad of traffic trouble". Try saying that ten times fast. I know, I'll make up a little Star Tribune tongue twister. Ready?
The troglodytic triplets traveled on Metro Transit to transcend the triad of traffic trouble.
Translation: take the bus, because with Obama's visit on top of the Gopher and Twins games, traffic is going to be a mess. That's all they had to say, really. Moving on...
Generally speaking, I'm a fan of alliteration, and I find James Lileks' alliteration to be quite artful. In today's edition of his column, he writes about the SweeTango, a hybrid of Honeycrisp and Zestra apples which Lileks describes as the "apex of apple art". He goes on to say that an appled called Horace "brought up images of equine effluvia". I find these examples of alliteration to be much nicer than "triad of traffic trouble" but I guess it's just a matter of taste.
James Lilieks' column is a definite bright spot in the Strib for me, and I think it's a shame that his column is routinely buried in the Metro section when it really deserves to be more cartoon-adjacent. In fact, I wish James Lileks could write the entire paper--I prefer his purposeful zaniness to the accidental variety that pervades the pages of the paper. (Hey, look at that...I can alliterate too, bitches!)
Showing posts with label Twins. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Twins. Show all posts
Friday, September 11, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Presto, Change-o, You're a Verb!
Lest I should ever worry that I will find a dearth of silliness in the Star Tribune, I will remind myself to turn to the Sports section. On page C5 of today’s paper I found a glorious little nugget of folly nestled into a story written by La Velle E. Neal, “Halladay’s Twins hex halted by Pavano”.
He writes: “Pavano doesn’t miss bats like Halladay can; he is going to have company on the bases. But Pavano can Houdini his way out of jams, like in the fifth inning when a run was in and Travis Snider was on third with one out.”
I understand the image Mr. Neal is trying to conjure up here, but I just have to point out that Houdini is not a verb. Houdini is a noun. Houdini is a noun because Houdini is the name of a person, and a noun is a person, place, or thing. A verb, on the other hand, is an action. A person, such as Harry Houdini, is not, in and of himself, an action. He performs actions.
The above quote could have been written like this: “Pavano can, like the great magician Harry Houdini, extricate himself from tight spaces.”
I will admit that one of the unique and charming characteristics of the English language is that it allows nouns to be turned into verbs:
“They cornered him.”
“She stonewalled.”
“I’ll brain you!”
However, in this case, turning Houdini into a verb (Presto, change-o, you’re a verb!) just seems like lazy writing to me. It sounds like a frat boy saying, “Dude, that chick tried to Facebook me, but I totally Houdinied my way out of it.”
I'm surprised the story didn't end like this: "And then, after Joe Nathan earned his 38th save in the ninth inning, he turned to Pavano and asked, 'Pavano...where's my car?'"
He writes: “Pavano doesn’t miss bats like Halladay can; he is going to have company on the bases. But Pavano can Houdini his way out of jams, like in the fifth inning when a run was in and Travis Snider was on third with one out.”
I understand the image Mr. Neal is trying to conjure up here, but I just have to point out that Houdini is not a verb. Houdini is a noun. Houdini is a noun because Houdini is the name of a person, and a noun is a person, place, or thing. A verb, on the other hand, is an action. A person, such as Harry Houdini, is not, in and of himself, an action. He performs actions.
The above quote could have been written like this: “Pavano can, like the great magician Harry Houdini, extricate himself from tight spaces.”
I will admit that one of the unique and charming characteristics of the English language is that it allows nouns to be turned into verbs:
“They cornered him.”
“She stonewalled.”
“I’ll brain you!”
However, in this case, turning Houdini into a verb (Presto, change-o, you’re a verb!) just seems like lazy writing to me. It sounds like a frat boy saying, “Dude, that chick tried to Facebook me, but I totally Houdinied my way out of it.”
I'm surprised the story didn't end like this: "And then, after Joe Nathan earned his 38th save in the ninth inning, he turned to Pavano and asked, 'Pavano...where's my car?'"
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